Clerics and priests are the outstretched hand. Rubes are the sword and shield that protect that hand and pave its way forward.

Neerik Gulmar, Grand Inquisitor — The Holy Rube Handbook

The Holy Ministry of Rube Knights is the militant arm of the Church of the Holy Body: the protector of the Church, the enforcer of the Word of Zodo, and the army of the Theocracy of Caladonia. Its knights, known simply as Rubes, are widely regarded as the most feared military force on Nor'Ova. They are trained beyond the standard of any other army and equipped with arms and armor made for each knight individually. They are also bound to one another, and to Zodo, by rites no outsider fully understands.

Origins and the Name

There is no greater honor in all of Nor'Ova, nor in the skies above or in the life to come, than the honor to serve Holy Zodo and his most holy Church.

High Priest Valen Gailmore, founder of the Holy Ministry — The Holy Rube Handbook

By the early 1800s of the First Era, the Church of the Holy Body had long since emerged from hiding, and with that visibility came violence. Religious extremists of many stripes set upon its churches, clergy, and faithful. Some were zealots of El Anon or Kymara, and others came from within Zodoism itself, sects who saw the Church of the Holy Body as a corruption of the faith. In 1834 of the First Era, High Priest Valen Gailmore answered by founding a body of knights sworn to serve the Church and Zodo above all else: the Order of the Religious Benefactors.

The Church's enemies were not impressed. They mocked the young order's knights as "rubes," untrained beginners playing at soldiering. Valen embraced the insult. He reasoned that a well-trained army that carried the name of an untrained one would always be underestimated, and that being underestimated was an advantage worth keeping. To give the name a second meaning, he had ceremonial armor forged in a deep ruby red, each suit bearing the Eternal Flame of Zodo. The mockery became an identity, and the Order of the Religious Benefactors became the Holy Ministry of Rube Knights.

The ruby armor survives today as ceremonial dress, seen at holy days, processions, and the gates of the great churches. Few who have faced Rubes in battle still find the name amusing.

The Rube's Pledge

Rube Knights and Rube Meisters are the fulfillment of Zodo's word to us: that individually we have a great power, and together we have an even greater power. Rubes joined together have become an unstoppable force.

High Priest Amos, Avatar of Zodo — The Holy Rube Handbook

Every Rube is sworn to three oaths:

  • To safeguard the Church, its worshipers, and its holy documents and relics.
  • To safeguard one another, for as long as each remains true.
  • To carry out and enforce the will of Holy Zodo and his most holy Church.

In return, the Ministry promises much: the blessings of Zodo, training said to exceed anything else on Nor'Ova, arms and armor tailored to the individual knight, the backing of the most powerful army in the world, rewards for good service, and the right to claim what they desire from the enemies of the Church. Above all, it promises what the Divine Incantations promise every faithful soul: self-fulfillment and great power.

The Code

The Ministry's success rests on its code, and every Rube is expected to know it:

  • Rubes abide by the doctrines of the Divine Incantations at all times.
  • Rubes honor Zodo and the Church of the Holy Body, but always Zodo first.
  • Rubes protect the Church of the Holy Body, even from the Church's own members and leaders.
  • Rubes carry out their orders, unless those orders contradict the Word of Zodo and the Divine Incantations.
  • Rubes give freely and often to the Church, so that it may continue the Will of Zodo.
  • Rubes protect true believers and one another.
  • Should a brother become a traitor, Rubes remove that traitor and make an example of them.
  • Rubes remove any member of the Church or the Ministry who abandons the faith.
  • Rubes assist the priests of the Holy Body and protect them from harm.
  • Rubes embody the Doctrine of Power and Personal Growth, as taught in the Divine Incantations.

Nothing in the code forbids a Rube from enjoying life. Growing in power is not just permitted but expected. The Ministry sets only four prohibitions: never confuse the Will of Zodo, never claim yourself greater than Zodo who gave you your power, never mistake your own wants for the Will of Zodo, and never bring disgrace upon Zodo or his Church.

Zodo does want his believers to enjoy life. But when a Rube gets what they want, Zodo's Will is that they give credit and praise to Zodo. Otherwise, Zodo will take it from them.

The Holy Rube Handbook

Outsiders are quick to notice the tension within the code. A Rube's first loyalty is to Zodo, not to the Church, and the Rubes themselves decide who has abandoned the faith. That makes them a sword the Church must hold carefully, because a Rube can turn it on the Church's own leaders.

Structure

The Sub-Ministries

The Holy Ministry is divided into five sub-ministries, each with its own training and purpose:

  • Holy Guard: The guardians of the churches. They protect priests, clerics, church staff, and the High Priest himself.
  • Military: The main body of the Ministry, and the standing army of both the Church of the Holy Body and the Theocracy of Caladonia.
  • Intelligence: Rubes trained in espionage, tasked with knowing what the Church's enemies are planning before those enemies do.
  • Recruiters: Called the "kingdom builders," they seek out the most promising souls to join the Ministry's ranks.
  • Holy Shield: Rubes who brave danger to support, reinforce, and rescue their brothers and sisters. If a Rube falls into trouble, the Holy Shield gets them out of it.

Ranks

  • Rube Initiates: New recruits still learning what it means to be a Rube.
  • Rube Knights: Trained warriors of the Holy Body, and the bulk of the Ministry.
  • Rube Meisters: Leaders of Rube Knights. A Meister may command a battalion or a specialized squadron, depending on their sub-ministry.
  • Grand Rube Meisters: Meisters appointed to aid the Grand Inquisitor and the High Priest in governing the Ministry.
  • Grand Inquisitor: The commander of the Holy Ministry of Rube Knights, who answers only to the High Priest. The current Grand Inquisitor is Neerik Gulmar.

The Rubes and the Theocracy of Caladonia

The Theocracy of Caladonia is ruled by the High Priest of the Church of the Holy Body, the Avatar of Zodo, whose word is held as the word of Zodo himself. The current High Priest is Amos. Caladonia is also home to the Church's central seat, and the Rubes serve as its army and its law. Clerics in training are often assigned to serve alongside Rube Knights and Initiates, and the bond between the Church's priesthood and its knights runs deep in Caladonia.

Those who fled Caladonia for the dwarven protectorate of Val'Hara rarely speak of the Rubes, and never kindly.

Blood Bonding

No Initiate becomes a true Rube without the rite of Blood Bonding. This ceremony is distinct from the Church's blood baptism during the Week of Holies, though it clearly echoes it. What happens during the rite is known only to those who have undergone it. Its results, however, are harder to hide.

Bonded Rubes are said to speak to one another mind to mind, across any distance, so that the Ministry is never truly out of contact with its own. The bond also allows a Rube to wield enhancers, blood-powered devices fitted to weapons and armor that draw on the bearer's own strength to make the equipment sharper, sturdier, or more resilient than any smith could forge it. Enhancers are known to be useless in the hands of anyone who has not been bonded, which may be why so few have ever been recovered from a fallen Rube.

Whispers and Rumors

Much of what is said about the Rubes cannot be confirmed, and the Ministry has never been eager to correct the record. Among the more common claims:

  • They cannot be read. Priests who can sense a person's alignment or faith find nothing when they turn that gift on a Rube. Some say a skilled Rube can even show a false alignment or a false god, which would mean any pilgrim, merchant, or neighbor might secretly be one.
  • They hear voices. Rubes are said to hear whispers around them, offering hints, answers, and suggestions, though not always. The faithful call this the Mind of Zodo. Others suspect it is something darker.
  • They carry the fire of Xodod. Rube Knights are said to wreathe their blades in flame drawn from the pits of Xodod, a fire belonging to no element that no rune can ward against. Of the Meisters, it is whispered that they can call up an entire wall of it, stretching across a battlefield and burning friend and foe alike.
  • They do not die easily. Soldiers who have faced them tell of Rubes who should have fallen, yet found one last parry, one last step, one last breath.

The Holy Rube Handbook

The Holy Rube Handbook is given to every Initiate upon entering the Ministry. It covers the history of the order, the expectations of its knights, and the rewards of faithful service. Copies seldom leave the Ministry's hands, and those that surface outside Caladonia tend to be traded quietly, as much for curiosity as for insight into the most feared army on Nor'Ova. The handbook closes with a verse from the Divine Incantations:

Any who faithfully and wholly call upon my name and promise to give me praise, for them I will give all.

Incantation of Faith — The Divine Incantations